From what I know of the largest populace of Shaafis, the Indonesians, celebrating birthdays is not a normative part of their culture. From my time in the village, it definitely wasn't practiced and even if someone did express gratitude it was done by organising a religious gathering of sorts (local ustadh giving bayaan on suitable topic, qirat, anasheed, dhikr and dua and giving free food to villagers). In the UK I do not permit myself or my family to celebrate it save for in a manner not fixated upon placing such great importance on a specific date (being upset if the date is missed, buying lots of expensive presents beyond ones means etc). It's more important for my children at least to know that we have plenty of days of celebration and commeration not linked to oneself arriving in this world. But alas, extravagance and violations of sharia are increasingly common in such gatherings. Those same children when they become baligh will soon celebrate their own and friends birthdays with non mahrams.
He says it's mubah in itself. He does touch on the point I queried in my earlier post re whether this is considered imitation of non Muslims. He essentially says that because it is now widespread amongst Muslims, this isn't really imitation of non Muslims as it's not something specific to them. My take away from this is that, before it became widespread amongst Muslims, it wouldn't have been allowed because at that point it was indeed specific to them. And thus the early adopters of this trend are sinful whilst those continuing it are not. Correct me if I misunderstood The point of not doing haraam activities in order to celebrate is also made although it wouldn't make the celebration haraam in itself.
Beautiful post, I think most people won't appreciate or grasp how beautiful this response is. It points to intentions that need further evaluation in that they are not on the surface what might be the case in reality. This is because despite telling yourself your intention is such a such, it may turn out to be a wrapped intention with another one underneath- something entirely opposite or different. Usually its related to making you happy and if that's the case how is it entirely for the pleasure of Allah Most High then? Exactly, its severely tainted and should be corrected. But correcting it is the challenge because one conquered entirely by his nafs is on the leash and so how can he effect anything? The key is to stop indulging now and make things a bit more uncomfortable for yourself so you can start having a proper intention and stop destroying your actions. At the point of reading this post with Unbeknown's nafs shaking response you might have terror chills running down your spine thinking you may have spent all your life so far with ruined and insincere actions. My advice, stop fishing for "likes", grabbing your phone every 2 seconds, eating bad food that comes with captions like "I'm loving it" , make Tauba and ask for sincerity and add real discomfort to your lives so you can switch over the leash from you to "him"....
oh yes, the ultimate question - the Biggest among the BIG ones - "why?" should be asked frequently - to onself - just why amnI doing this? and then be frank - don't lie to yourself - and you will understand your nafs a great deal better.
@Khanah Habibi, let's make it simple. Is there any reference in the Shariah on the subject of commemorating, remembering the day of birth? Yes in Qur'an and Hadith Both. "And peace be upon him the day he was born and the day he dies and the day he is raised alive. (19/14) "Peace be upon me the day I was born, the day I die, and the day I will be raised back to life." Abu Qatada Ansari (Allah be pleased with him) reported that Allah's Massenger (ﷺ) was asked about fasting on Monday, whereupon he said: It is (the day) when I was born and revelation was sent down to me. (Muslim) So there you have clear references. The rest is whether the gathering has the correct Niyyah and how it's executed and that's it. You know what's Halal and haraam.
The ruling can change depending on the people and actions involved. 'celebrating birthdays' is a very loosely defined action. It is not an istilahi term in fiqh, or a well defined action even from a worldly perspective. To some people it can be just a private family event, to some it can be a party with intermingling and alcohol, some can even forego it's 2 main arkaan - cake and candles and just 'celebrate' with the lady of the house just making some biryani and zarda for the birthday boy/girl/adult, for some it's just a kids fun and games thing (with cake cutting of course, you know how Hajj is Arafah, budday is cake cutting) but it stops once the kid passes 7 yrs, some do it for themselves and well into their 50s and 60s, etc. If you want a ruling, you need to firstly list the components of the 'celebration', and given an exacting definition and description, then approach a mufti.
Everyone's post are very insightful, with respect to how egocentric the whole celebrations usually are i.e the need to be congratulated for being born (even though the mother did all the hard work- surely she should be congratulated instead) with both parents working hard to keep you alive when you couldn't fend for yourself, the need for a party atmosphere, gifts, social media posts, etc... But what is the actual ruling in the hanafi madhab? Are such things forbidden? Whilst the posters here will probably not engage in such activities for themselves- it is not necessary that our family and friends would be so understanding when it's their turn. If someone was aware of a scholarly ruling on the issue, that would be useful Jazak Allah khair
Most people are just being born into "this system" and operate their life under a whole set of sub systems that are just accepted as being the right and correct way. Take the education system (parrot fashion and the child does not even know why he is learning what he is learning and the teacher does not even know!), the medical and pharma system where you just get medicine that makes you worse with side effects that lead to the purchase of more medicine and this medicine has side effects so you need a new dose of medicine to offset those side effects too (you catch my drift?!!). Alas, birthdays is the same. You just do them and there is no point of introspective reflection on the way its done, its just accepted as the "norm" and so the thinking is its just normal and ok. But what's missing on the subject of birthdays and these gatherings is the question of the why and what is the intention. There are three components to this, 1. why are you gathering? 2. how is it being conducted and is it something of Barakah and 3. Is it being used to maximum benefit if one goes ahead. There are deeper inherent questions to the way we have become in general and its just centered on no awareness as to why we are doing things throughout our daily routines. Even driving to work, we just do it but do we even ask ourselves, is the the optimum mode for me to make Allah happy? It's the dead heart that just deadens the awareness of the "why" and the reminder of the Niyyah. The emphasis on comfort has prevailed over the need to adopt discomfort to conquer the other enemy (the ego) which no one seems to want to talk about anymore!! It's all about how much ease and entertainment can we get and how much of it is readily available. Well it's time people understood that their hearts are dead and they have no Ihsan because pleasure seeking has become the accepted norm and so birthdays fall under this too unless the reason for the gathering is sincerely questioned. I'd say, if you want to rejoice for being born a Muslim or someone's else's birth into Islam, hold a permissible gathering, make a Dua for the person, give acceptable gifts that increase love and strengthen ties and enjoin the good while forbidding the evil then go for it. Otherwise, are you just adding more hardness to an already dead heart?
These days we are all confronted with issues of evil vs lesser evil. At times and places, lesser evil can function as a backfire that successfully contains a larger wildfire. At other times and places, it's nothing but a slippery slope into greater evil. Do you let your kids attend naatkhwani with neon lighting or listen to modern naats or do you risk them going to nightclubs or listening to kufriya bollywood songs? Will the former lead to the latter or will it be a deterrent to it? Would you rather your wife or sister or daughter wear a fashionable colorful abaya with scarf only, sans niqab; or do you risk them being into bepurdagi? Will the former lead to the latter or will it be a deterrent to it? The list goes on and on. Same story with Shariah compliant buddays vs western style birthdays with cakes, candles, party hats and ostentatious themes. I never needed it, but was taught about the concept of backfires when I lived in the countryside one time. I was told point blank, it's better for you to burn your backyard and lawn yourself in order to protect your actual home, livestock, and main belongings from the wildfire. See this page about backfires. Do read it despite it not being related to the thread... https://firefighterinsider.com/why-firefighters-set-backfires-the-science-of-controlled-burns/ ... and try to correlate it to your personal circumstances and your understanding of fiqh and tasawwuf. The wildfires in our context given our times are corrupt aqaid and haram. Just remember:
wa'alaykum as salaam yes, it's a way of tashkkur for the gift of life, showing gratitude to Allah ta'ala as one's parents do in the form of aqeeqa - so obviously, it shouldn't involve imitation of the kuffar. Its a time for introspection and resolves. A review of where one's headed to in life. A deeply personal occasion. If it involves qira'at, wa'az, na'ath, charity and maybe a respectable dinner with friends and family - I don't see a problem. However, even these praiseworthy activities, if done with extravaganza, can develop into a status cue - where people feel pressurized to throw expensive parties just to maintain their social status. Simply partying cannot be called tashkkaur - especially if it involves haram activities like music, dancing and intermingling with non-mehram relatives and/or neighbors. I think this is just another reflection of the "party-culture". People simply want an excuse to indulge in eating and socializing, with chatter and laughter - "gaiety and merry making" they call it. This is alien to the culture of Islam - it is a sign of gaflah and an unhealthy attachment to the present life - boy would it be heavy when one has to finally leave it! But if does not involve haram activities - I don't know what the ruling would be. oh yeah, this one's surely a borrowed illness. even from a purely dunyawi standpoint, I cannot understand why people want to be wished "happy" - what difference does it make? I guess it's another one of those weird culture-influenced psychological oddities.
Assalaamu alaykum, I would also like to know the answer to this. If celebration is as you put it in the original post i.e. Fasting, making dua, then surely there wouldn't be anything wrong with this in the Hanafi madhab. However, my question would pertain to celebration the way is done these days e.g having a cake, giving gifts, balloons, party, cards, etc. The vast majority of Muslim birthdays in the UK are devoid of any religious aspect and is more an imitation of the western method of celebrating birthdays. On this basis, would this become impermissible? I personally don't care about my own birthday and have never celebrated it- but others take offence if you don't congratulate them. Jazak Allah khair
Salaam -e- Masnoon What is the ruling on celebrating our/our children's birthdays per hanafi madhhab? For the shafis it is mustahabb provided it's done with the intention of shukr and in the sunnah manner such as fasting and other generally mustahabb activities like feeding and charity. I ask because growing up in a predominantly wahhabi locality our family had always frowned upon the practice. In-fact, the term itself has acquired a pejorative meaning in wahabi circles to the extent that labeling milad celebrations as "Huzur (sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam) ka 'budday' mana rahe hai" was condemnation enough without having to present other objections to it. We'd only ever heard the weird one sided argument that celebrating birthdays is foolish because a birthday signifies subtraction of a year from one's allotted time on earth and brings one closer to death so it's a time to express grief rather than happiness! Only recently did I learn of the shafi ruling that celebrating birthdays is mustahabb even for us commoners not to mention the scholars, saints and the Prophets ('alaihim us salaatu wa salaam).
