Ghalib's masterpiece (my poor rhyming translation version 1.0)

Discussion in 'Poetry' started by naqshbandijamaati, Dec 15, 2007.

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  1. :s1:

    thanks. yeh i did not look up in the deewaan but only those couplets i knew from memory thus i knew i had missed out some verses. also thanks for the daagh dihlavi tribute ghazal-- i was not aware of it! He is my second effort with the missing verses also translated. please comment!


    1. ye na thi hamari qismat ke wisaal-e-yaar hotaa
    2. agar aur jeetey rahtey yahi intezaar hotaa

    To unite with my love was not my fate
    A longer life'd just mean a longer wait!


    3. terey wa'adey par jiye ham; tu yeh jaan, jhooT jaana [1]
    4. key khushi sey mar na jaatey agar aytebaar hotaa
    I lived by your promise but, darling, it was a lie:
    Because if it had been true, of joy I would die!





    5. teri nazuki sey jaana key bandha tha `ahd-e-boodaa
    6. kabhi tuu na toD saktaa agar ustuwaar hotaa
    From your delicacy I knew that you'd been bound by oath!
    And even if you were determined, to break it you were loath!


    7. koyee merey dil sey puuche terey teer-e-neem kash ko
    8. yeh khalish kahaN sey hotee jo jigar key paar hotaa

    Someone ask my heart of your half-drawn arrow
    This anguish wouldn't be, if it 'd pierced the marrow!


    9. yeh kahaN ki dosti hai, ke baneN haiN dost naasiH
    10. koyi charah saaz hotaa, koyi gham gusaar hotaa!

    What kind of friendship is this--my friends advise me!
    They should give me solace and not chide me!



    11. rag-e-sang sey Tapakta, woh lahuu key phir na thamtaa
    12. jisey gham samajh rahey ho, yeh agar sharar hotaa [2]
    Indeed it would have drawn blood from a stone
    The passion which you as sorrow have known!


    13. gham agarchey jaaN gusil hai, pey kahaN bacheN ke dil hai [3]
    14. gham-e-ishq gar na hotaa, gham-e-rozgaar hotaa

    Though the sorrow be deadly, after all a heart a heart will be:
    If not the pangs of love, then the sorrows of work would be!

    15. kahuN kis sey maiN ke kya hai, shab-e-gham buree balaa hai
    16. mujhe kya buraa tha marnaa agar ek baar hotaa

    To whom shall I tell: the night of sorrow is long indeed
    I wouldn't mind dying if only once 'twas decreed!


    17. huwey mar key ham jo ruswaa, huwey kyuN na gharq-e-daryaa
    18. na kabhi janaazah uT'htaa, na kaheeN mazaar hotaa
    Disgraced by my death I should've drowned instead
    There'd be no funeral nor a gravestone for my head!

    19. usey kawn dekh saktaa, woh yagaana hai, woh yaktaa
    20. jo du-ee ki buu bhi hotee, to kaheeN duchaar hotaa [4]
    Who can dare see Him? Singularly unique is He!
    If there were even a hint of duality, Him we would see!


    21. yeh masaayil-e-tasawwuf, ye bayaan ghaalib
    22. tujhe hum wali samajhtey, jo na baadah-khaar hotaa

    This verse of yours Ghalib, this Sufi lore that you opine
    We'd consider you a Saint yourself but alas for your wine!

    ---------------------------
     
  2. abu Hasan

    abu Hasan Administrator

    daagh dehlawi pays tribute to this ghazal thus:
    ajab apna Haal hotaa jo wisaal-e-yaar hotaa
    kabhi jaan sadqey hotee kabhi dil nisaar hotaa


    na mazaa hai dushmani meiN na hai luTf dostee meiN
    koyee ghayr ghayr hotaa koyee yaar yaar hotaa


    yeh mazaa tha dil'lagee ka key baraabar aag lagtee
    na tumheN qaraar hotaa na hameN qaraar hotaa

    terey wa`ade par sitamgar abhi aur sabr kartey
    agar apni zindagi kaa hameN aytebaar hotaa

     
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2007
  3. abu Hasan

    abu Hasan Administrator

    asif, you missed an famous line from the ghazal:
    gham-e-ishq gar na hotaa, gham e rozgaar hotaa.

    ----------------
    here is the full transliterated ghazal from his deewan:
    1. ye na thi hamari qismat ke wisaal-e-yaar hotaa
    2. agar aur jeetey rahtey yahi intezaar hotaa

    3. terey wa'adey par jiye ham; tu yeh jaan, jhooT jaana [1]
    4. key khushi sey mar na jaatey agar aytebaar hotaa

    5. teri nazuki sey jaana key bandha tha `ahd-e-boodaa
    6. kabhi tuu na toD saktaa agar ustuwaar hotaa

    7. koyee merey dil sey puuche terey teer-e-neem kash ko
    8. yeh khalish kahaN sey hotee jo jigar key paar hotaa

    9. yeh kahaN ki dosti hai, ke baneN haiN dost naasiH
    10. koyi charah saaz hotaa, koyi gham gusaar hotaa!

    11. rag-e-sang sey Tapakta, woh lahuu key phir na thamtaa
    12. jisey gham samajh rahey ho, yeh agar sharar hotaa [2]

    13. gham agarchey jaaN gusil hai, pey kahaN bacheN ke dil hai [3]
    14. gham-e-ishq gar na hotaa, gham-e-rozgaar hotaa

    15. kahuN kis sey maiN ke kya hai, shab-e-gham buree balaa hai
    16. mujhe kya buraa tha marnaa agar ek baar hotaa

    17. huwey mar key ham jo ruswaa, huwey kyuN na gharq-e-daryaa
    18. na kabhi janaazah uT'htaa, na kaheeN mazaar hotaa

    19. usey kawn dekh saktaa, woh yagaana hai, woh yaktaa
    20. jo du-ee ki buu bhi hotee, to kaheeN duchaar hotaa [4]

    21. yeh masaayil-e-tasawwuf, ye bayaan ghaalib
    22. tujhe hum wali samajhtey, jo na baadah-khaar hotaa
    ---------------------------
    footnotes:
    1. in the sharH, it is written: to yeh jaan chooT jaana.

    2. in sharH of prof.salim chishti: woh agar sharar hotaa.

    3. an obvious copy error is found in the sharH; i have used the deewan version.

    4. duchaar - 'would be seen'. it is this couplet which makes ghalib to claim his knowledge of tasawwuf. there is obvious word play here as: do-chaar but the couplet as a whole describes tawheed.
     
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2007
  4. "To unite with my love was not my fate
    A longer life'd just mean a longer wait!
    Someone ask my heart of your half-drawn arrow
    This anguish wouldn't be, if it 'd pierced the marrow!
    To whom shall I tell: the night of sorrow is long indeed
    I wouldn't mind dying if only once 'twas decreed!
    I lived by your promise but, darling, it was a lie:
    Because if it had been true, of joy I would die!
    What kind of friendship is this--my friends advise me!
    They should give me solace not chide me!
    Disgraced by my death I should've drowned instead
    There'd be no funeral nor a gravestone for my head!
    This verse of yours Ghalib, this Sufi lore that you opine
    We'd consider you a Saint yourself but alas for your wine!
     

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